Moving West

As some of you may or may not know, I have moved back to my home state of Nebraska. A lot of prayer went into the move and I truly believe that this is where God wants me right now. Moving to Nebraska meant being closer to home. Although "closer" is still actually 8 hours from home. Who knew that Nebraska was so big?! (The red dot is where I am located and my family is just north of Omaha.)

My new little town is called Harrison, actually the Village of Harrison. It boasts 251 people...now 252. Everyone knows everyone and everything here. I can walk or ride a bike to school, the post office, bank, etc. because there is no need to drive with things so close. The nearest grocery store is about 30 miles away; nearest Walmart is 50+ miles. So far in the one week that I have lived here, I have hit two birds and one rattlesnake. I have seen antelope, buffalo, coyotes, deer, and of course horses and lots of cattle. The landscape out here is so different from anywhere that I have ever been. Huge open fields, buttes, sandhills, and the biggest sky ever! Who knew the sky was so big? It reminded me of the following verses from Job.

"Also with moisture He saturates the thick clouds; 

He scatters His bright clouds.  

And they swirl about, being turned by His guidance, 

That they may do whatever He commands them
On the face of the whole earth.
He causes it to come,
Whether for correction,
Or for His land,
Or for mercy.

Listen to this, O Job;
Stand still and consider the wondrous works of God.

Do you know when God dispatches them,
And causes the light of His cloud to shine?

Do you know how the clouds are balanced,
Those wondrous works of Him who is perfect in knowledge?"

Job 37:11-16

I can be driving in the car to a town and not pass anyone for at least 10 minutes. The average time between seeing cars (yes, my dad and I timed it) is about 1.5 minutes. Listening to the radio, "Today's modern music" the first thing that came on was "Chariots of Fire".....I suppose that is pretty modern for out here.
Oh yes, and don't forget that you may see cattle walking along the road, outside of the fence. You may even be stopped by policemen so that cattle can cross the road....yes this did actually happen.

Life has become a total change of pace, as you have read above.  Life is a much slower pace here in Harrison. God knew exactly what I needed in a new place, not what I had wanted or expected. I look forward to teaching and coaching in this small town and am grateful for this opportunity to serve the Lord in this way. 

"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, 

to those who are the called according to His purpose."

Romans 8:28

Hola España

Hello Spain,

It's good to finally meet you. Your cities are beautiful and your people kind. You welcome with big hearts, but I wonder who has your heart. Is your heart set on God above or earth below?

As I sit and ponder you, I am amazed at the surrounding beauty, but my heart aches for you. You have a rich history in Christianity, but is it just history or is it now? Your churches stand over the centuries, yet it is just a building. How has the heart of Christianity stood? On top of the houses are crosses to mark where past Christians have lived, but has that legacy lived on? 

My heart does not ache just for you, but for those around the world. Those who are lost because they don´t know Jesus. How are they supposed to know when we look at the past? People need to see Jesus living now inside of us...inside of you now. "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16) 

Spain, you are one of the most historic and beautiful countries that I have ever been too. Know that I am praying for you and love telling you about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. God is working here. Open your hearts and minds to listen to what He has to tell you. His plans are much greater than ours.

Love in Christ,

Tabitha

God's Great Grace!

The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want.

He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.

He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever.

-Psalm 23-

How great is it to know that the Lord, who is the Creator, Sustainer, Provider, is our Shepherd. He loves us so much! What a comfort to me this is! The God of eternity cares enough for me! 

He cares enough to allow me, a simple-minded human being, share His love with others. While in Trinidad this past year, God gave me and a dear friend the opportunity to lead a young woman to Christ. If you have ever seen the transforming power of the Holy Spirit, it is a powerful thing! Her life and mine are forever changed. My heart rejoices at the thought of seeing her again someday in heaven!

Tired and Discouraged

A few weeks ago, I took a break from my usual work routine and went to the mountains for the day. I needed a break away from the stresses of teaching and coaching. It was a time for me to reflect on what the Lord has been doing in my life. As I sat down, the scripture that came to mind was 

Psalm 121 which says,

"I will lift up my eyes to the hills—
From whence comes my help? 

 My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.

He will not allow your foot to be moved;
He who keeps you will not slumber.

Behold, He who keeps Israel
Shall neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
The Lord is your shade at your right hand.

The sun shall not strike you by day,
Nor the moon by night.

 The Lord shall preserve you from all evil;
He shall preserve your soul.

The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in
From this time forth, and even forevermore."

On that day, I was so discouraged and tired. Tired of fighting for the right thing, tired of teaching and coaching, tired of not knowing the next step, tired of applying for jobs and not hearing anything back, just tired. Why didn't God care about all of those things? Why did I feel like He was being silent? Reflecting on it now, I know that God was not silent, that He did care and does care. He was asking me to be patient, to wait on Him, to release those chains weighing me down and to lay them at His feet. Once I finally let those chains go, God gave me a peace that everything would be ok. God's plan was much better than my plans ever were. If you are struggling today, know that God does care. He is taking care of every little detail and all you have to do is trust. Have faith that He knows what is best! 

Overwhelmed

It has been over 6 months since my last blog post. Funny thing is that it feels just like yesterday. I started multiple blogs, but have not finished them. School started, teaching and coaching took over, and then over 6 months goes by. I am overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by teaching, coaching, trying to keep up in life, remembering things I should do, etc. 

The good thing is that I don't have to do it alone. I have a God who cares about the little details. When everything is not going as planned, or I am too overwhelmed to move ahead, He is right there; guiding me, helping me, and directing me. No matter what. I would not be a teacher without Him. Daily I have to ask for patience, for direction, for wisdom in teaching students. Where would I be without the Lord? Teaching is a mission field. I love teaching. The moment when a student "understands" is priceless. Let alone I teach lifelong skills. I hope to some day see the things that they learn in class becoming part of who they are. Not only teaching them to be conscious of their health and physical activity, but to learn respect; to learn what it means to help others; and most of all, to know about a loving God who sent His only Son to die so that we may live. 

My goal daily is to shine the light of Christ. Light drives away darkness and I can personally tell you that the public schools are full of darkness. At times it is overwhelming and suffocating. I come home and just cry. Cry from the way satan works through these kids. All the more reason to be the light. Allow God to shine His light through you! Don't let the darkness overwhelm, know that light chases darkness away. So let your little light shine!

“You are the light of the world. 

A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.  

Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, 

but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house.  

Let your light so shine before men, 

that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."

Matthew 5:14-16

My Heart is Full

My heart is full.

Full of praise- for my One and Only Savior, Jesus Christ;

Full of love- for the lost and hurting, love for my Jesus;

Full of awe and wonder- because of God's indescribable ways.

My heart is full of many things all because of knowing the Lord. God is one who constantly amazes me. His provision in His perfect timing is beyond my feeble mind. Yet, as I often say, why am I surprised? God has promised us that He will supply all our needs according to His purpose.(Philippians 4:19).

It has been a tough year for me. My plans and timing are not God's plan and timing. This year I said that I would go back to Trinidad. Yet, every time that I pursued going, something always came up. My heart was so overwhelmed with sadness that I wouldn't be able to go. Last year I had such a clear calling and everything fell right into place, but this year was different. Was I supposed to go or not? Is that where the Lord wanted me to be? 

Five weeks ago on a Sunday, a woman from church invited me to go out to eat with all the "old folks." I said yes, because I have a special place in my heart for older people. I love being able to talk with them and here how God has worked and continues to work in their lives. While out to lunch with them, Ms. Judy asked what I typically do in my summers and what I wanted to do with my life. I immediately start talking about Trinidad. Once finished, she looked straight at me and said, "Why are you not there? What is holding you back?" I felt like God was telling me at the moment "GO! I will provide. Have faith." With money being tight, I still wasn't 100% sure if I should go, but those words kept coming back to me. I knew I had to go. So taking a leap of faith, I told the Lord yes. 

I bought my plane ticket a few days later, actually it was on my birthday. Then I left for Trinidad that Saturday. Talk about a short turn around. I wanted to be able to spend as much time as I could there. After buying the ticket, I found some willing people to help look after my house and animals and before I left God provided an extra $500 from a family member and a dear friend. Who was I to worry when God said He would take care of it! Like I said at the beginning of this post, my heart is full. The Lord keeps bringing me back to Trinidad and I know one day it will be permanent. The relationships that I have built and the people I have met along the way are all part of a bigger picture that I cannot wait to see!

Then He said to His disciples, 

“Therefore I say to you, 

do not worry about your life, 

what you will eat; nor about the body, what you will put on. 

Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing. 

Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap, 

which have neither storehouse nor barn; 

and God feeds them. 

Of how much more value are you than the birds? 

And which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? 

If you then are not able to do the least, why are you anxious for the rest? 

Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 

If then God so clothes the grass, which today is in the field and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith?

“And do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, 

nor have an anxious mind. 

For all these things the nations of the world seek after, 

and your Father knows that you need these things. 

But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added to you. 

“Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom. 

Sell what you have and give alms; 

provide yourselves money bags which do not grow old, 

a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, 

where no thief approaches nor moth destroys.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Luke 12:22-34

(Pictures and another blog about Trinidad coming soon!) 

Grievous Burdens

There are days and weeks where life weighs me down and these past few weeks have been them. I have never understand the mindset of teenagers. Between teaching, coaching, and just living, I am worn down; at the bottom. My heart is heavy. I am grieved. Our children are lost. I am tired. Tired of trying to solve the problem. Even though I know I can't save every child. I care. It hurts, especially when it hurts my Jesus. I can never understand the pain and suffering that Jesus went through by dying on the cross or the pain of constant rejection.

It hurts when you put your all into something and try to help someone and they throw it back in your face. Why continue to help? Because Jesus did. He took rejection on the cross by taking the penalty of our sins. Jesus knew that He would be rejected. Yet, even in knowing that people would reject Him, He still went through with the plan and died for us. I will never understand that kind of rejection but I feel a little of the pain.

This week a student drew a picture instead of doing his assignment. The picture was of Jesus. Blood running from his head, chest, hands, and feet. A crown of thorns on His head with a rope drawn around His neck hanging dead. I almost threw up. This was my breaking point. Why? Why God?! My heart broke. It broke for the student, the others who are lost, the ones who know no better. I wanted to lash out in anger, but instead God told me no.

“You have heard that it was said, 

‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  

But I say to you, 

love your enemies, 

bless those who curse you, 

do good to those who hate you, 

and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you,  

that you may be sons of your Father in heaven." 

Matthew 5:43-45a

As a Child of God, I am told to love, not hate. Pray, not lash out in anger. No matter how sad and grieved I am by this, I know that my God is also grieved. My job here on this earth is to show love and lead others to Him no matter how grievous the situation. Please join with me and pray. Pray for our generations, especially the upcoming one. Know that our prayers will be heard and that God grieves with us. And love. Love like never before. 

 "A new commandment I give to you, 

that you love one another; 

as I have loved you, 

that you also love one another.  

By this all will know that you are My disciples, 

if you have love for one another.”

John 13:35