Friday, May 15, 2015

Grievous Burdens

There are days and weeks where life weighs me down and these past few weeks have been them. I have never understand the mindset of teenagers. Between teaching, coaching, and just living, I am worn down; at the bottom. My heart is heavy. I am grieved. Our children are lost. I am tired. Tired of trying to solve the problem. Even though I know I can't save every child. I care. It hurts, especially when it hurts my Jesus. I can never understand the pain and suffering that Jesus went through by dying on the cross or the pain of constant rejection.

It hurts when you put your all into something and try to help someone and they throw it back in your face. Why continue to help? Because Jesus did. He took rejection on the cross by taking the penalty of our sins. Jesus knew that He would be rejected. Yet, even in knowing that people would reject Him, He still went through with the plan and died for us. I will never understand that kind of rejection but I feel a little of the pain.

This week a student drew a picture instead of doing his assignment. The picture was of Jesus. Blood running from his head, chest, hands, and feet. A crown of thorns on His head with a rope drawn around His neck hanging dead. I almost threw up. This was my breaking point. Why? Why God?! My heart broke. It broke for the student, the others who are lost, the ones who know no better. I wanted to lash out in anger, but instead God told me no.

“You have heard that it was said, 
‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  
But I say to you, 
love your enemies, 
bless those who curse you, 
do good to those who hate you, 
and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you,  
that you may be sons of your Father in heaven." 
Matthew 5:43-45a

As a Child of God, I am told to love, not hate. Pray, not lash out in anger. No matter how sad and grieved I am by this, I know that my God is also grieved. My job here on this earth is to show love and lead others to Him no matter how grievous the situation. Please join with me and pray. Pray for our generations, especially the upcoming one. Know that our prayers will be heard and that God grieves with us. And love. Love like never before. 

 "A new commandment I give to you, 
that you love one another; 
as I have loved you, 
that you also love one another.  
By this all will know that you are My disciples, 
if you have love for one another.”
John 13:35